The Poker Lab Rat

Good US citizens, so fond of that heinous private recreational activity, online poker, may at least cringe at this joke:

A number of US players unsure of the implications of the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act and frustrated by the recent fervour that anti-gambling crusaders are using to prevent payments being processed, have been looking for ways to wean themselves off the game of poker, and indeed gambling for money.

One guy has tried by going along to his local card room and standing behind his friend as he plays instead of joining in the game. It’s been pretty tough getting started but now he just watches the action with a gleam in his eye and tries to pick the run of cards.

He never bets any real money as he only plays an imaginary, fantasy game and bets in his mind. When asked how he’s going he replies (with a sudden facial spasm) that he has only lost his mind three times.